The 2nd day of the new year. Usually it goes unnoticed; overshadowed by the much celebrated 1st.  But, I think, the 2nd is the most important.  After all the partying, merry making and celebratory whoops, the 2nd is usually the day that everyone got over from their hangover; and that’s when reality sunk in.  The 2nd is when almost everyone starts doing their New Year resolutions (usually for not very long after!).  It’s a sobering day (in more ways than one).  It is when people realised that there is no turning back.  This is it. It’s the new year.

I never am a person to make resolutions, but I like learning from mistakes.  So usually, the 2nd is reserved for me to think back and learn.  So what did I learn and what lesson should I take from the noughties?

Firstly, being happy.  No one is responsible except for me, on whether or not, I am happy.  Theoritically, it is easy. Doing, not so because you can’t dictate your emotions which is dependent on recent events, other people, hormonal imbalance, medications and/or many other factors.  However, you can try your darnest to take those elements that make you happy and put them on repeat mode until you are delirious.  It can be a cheesy song, the company of a good friend, your cat, your child, your work, eating, your other half (or eating your other half!)…anything to counteract the effects that make you melancholy.  So in two-oh-one-oh, I shall try my best to be happy even if it means losing out on certain events/people/friendships/things…

And yes, secondly, friendships.  I made many of these in the past year or so.  I realised one thing.  Friends come and go and that is how it is.  Someone (okay, it was Dew), told me that “Friends are families you can choose” (but she also told me that “Friends in need is a friend indeed but a friend with weed is better!”).  Coincidentally, I learnt a new word about friendship during the same time – frenemies. It’s a new word coined by the kids from the Hills and NY socialites (who also coined the word BFF¹, BFFE², BFS³).  Frenemies is those kind of friends you need to be wary of.  They are usually your very close friends but who are close to you because they need to feed from you just like a parasite.  They are there during your darkest moments but then turn around to gloat that they are not in your situation.  They can also be someone whom you are very close too, fall out of and now is your enemy armed with the most embarassing secrets you have.  They feed from your unhappiness, getting front seat at the circus, at your expense, of course. This is even more dangerous than your enemy.  This is your enemy with the biggest warfare that can hurt your very vulnerabilities.  Frenemies are the worst and you don’t even know they are coming to get you.  *shudders*

Still on friendships…I made many good ones last year and that was the salvage of 2009 from being a super crappy year.  I met up with my Primary school friends (after 22 years!), Secondary school friends who have now become some of my closest friends, old friends from my early twenties, and many, many new bonds too!  So I am thankful for those. While these friendships might change over time, I shall relish while its still good.

And yes, good.  Being good is hard.  Being good all year is harder.  But I did try, although not hard enough.  I did try to inculcate good habits like picking up running, eating less carbs, going for my full medical checkup, taking care more of my health.  Sometimes being good interferes with me being happy (please see my first point), so I chose the later.  So yes, I was not good all year round but I was good enough. And I was happy.

And my last point is, having enough.  No one will say they have enough. Nothing is enough, especially money.  Money No Enough, but that is a problem being in Singapore (and the world, being in recession and all) so not entirely my fault!  However, I am content.  Content that I can put food on the table, that we have a roof over our head, that my daughter has everything for her education and medical needs, that I have a job & a running business.  So what if sometimes we are tight.  We get by.  I don’t need expensive bags or shoes, or annual holidays, or even staycations.  I know where I stand, and I am comfortable with it but I do strive to be better of course!

Being better. So in 2010, I want it to be better.  How?  By keeping and doing things that make me happy.  By keeping and fostering good friendships.  By keeping up with the good things and being thankful for what I already have.  I will get rid of things that make me unhappy.  Not dwell on things I can’t change.  Move on.

So that’s it for two-oh-one-oh.

1  BFF : Best Friends Forever   2  BFFE: Best Friends Forever & Ever  3  BFS: Best Friends Sometimes

Tags: Friendships, Life, New Year, Resolutions

This entry was posted on Saturday, January 2nd, 2010 at 12:08 AM and is filed under Life, Musings. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.